Power of Association and Dissociation.

Hello Friends,

Welcome to Anbusivam's Blog Page.

Let's do a quick experiment before reading further. Think of two situations from your past, one pleasant and another unpleasant. Carefully notice when you recall those incidents, wether you relive them or just recall them as an observer. If you've relive them, experience the same emotions and feelings as if you are undergoing the same situation right now then you are fully associated with the incident. In case if you can objectively observe yourself going through the incident in the past then its clear that you are dissociated with the incident.

Now how does this association and dissociation helps us in our lives...???

Simple thumb rule I would prefer to follow is associate with positive or useful things in life and dissociate from the negative or not useful things in life. I think I've told this in one of my earlier posts as well. Few months ago I went to the hill station Ooty with few of my good friends. One of them had been to Ooty the previous year with her family,and they had a wonderful time spending there, enjoying with the nature. But, one unpleasant incident was, she had lost her gold ring in the lake. This time when we decided to go on a boat ride that particular friend was not at all ready to come with us, as she had closely associated that unpleasant memory of losing her ring in the same lake the previous year. Though she had so many other very pleasant memories from her previous visit, she has closely taken that incident to her heart and started reliving the same old incident right in front of us. We could see her literally going through the same experience she had when ring was lost. If she could have dissociated herself from that incident, she could have objectively thought about how to keep the valuables safe during such a boat ride and still enjoy and have fun in that beautiful lake and boat ride.

If you are seeing someone getting depressed, dejected very often, I am sure they dissociate from their positive experience and associate into the negative experience. Learning to choose when to associate and when to dissociate gives us a profound way of living our lives.

If we want to truly enjoy our lives, two basic principles to be followed:



1. Associate with the pleasant memories, so that we can relive that, relish the joy, enjoy all the happy and pleasant state of mind and use those positive attitudes for the success of our future.

2. Dissociate with the unpleasant memories. so that we can revisit that purely as an observer or onlooker, learn from it, correct our mistakes of the past and still use those learning for the success of future.


Thanks for visiting my page.

With Love,
Anbusivam

Leading Life in a Simple Way

Hello Friends,

Welcome to Anbusivam’s blog page.

These days, almost all my interactions and general talks ends up in the topics on increasing oil prices, rising commodity prices and rising inflation (This week's Indian inflation number is @ 11.36% hitting its 13year high). I am sure you too are hearing these talks everywhere in a bus, train, airport, mall, market and in all over the places.

Phew…!!! Companies are in to cost cutting mode. Finance managers are looking for reducing the operating costs in each and every corner, even to the extent of buying low cost toilet tissues.

Only way we individuals can cope with these kinds of situations is with “Voluntary Simplicity”. Voluntary simplicity comes from within. It is the only way of more sustainable human existence in this world. Voluntary simplicity is a matter of personal responsibility and conscious awareness of how we live on the planet. It means identifying the difference between our needs and our wants. Needs are those things that are necessary for our survival - food, clothing, and shelter. Wants are all the other things we desire and to a large extent are driven by media advertising. Simplicity as a life-style is the identifiable difference between needs and wants, and the awareness.

The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak. ~Hans Hofmann.

Practical Steps to Simplifying Our Life:

1. Get yourself with what you really need and not what you want.

2. Limit your buying habits. If we can escape materialism, we can easily get into the habit of buying less. And that will mean less stuff, less spending, less frustration.

3. Limit your media consumption, media advertisements dominates most of our buying decisions. Simplify your life and your information consumption by limiting it.

4. Learn to live frugally. Living frugally means buying less, wanting less, and leaving less of a footprint on the earth. It’s directly related to simplicity.

5. Before you buy something, write the item down on a note and if you still want it after a month, purchase it then.

6. Have a Buy Nothing Day.

7. Walk down or take out your bicycle to round the corner shopping.

8. Decide what is really working in your life and let go of that which no longer serves you.

9. Brew your own coffee at home instead of spending time and money in that posh café corner.

10. Find friends who know the glass is half-full or in other words, find friends who share the same value system as you do.

After all the above,

Always ask: Will this simplify my life? If the answer is no, reconsider.

Thanks for visiting my page.

With Love
Anbusivam

Standard of Life Vs Standard of Living

Hello Friends,

Welcome to Anbusivam’s blog page.

There are two most critical things in life, one is the “Standard of Life” and other is the “Standard of Living”. We human beings have done so many things to fix our external things so as to increase our standard of living and nothing has been done to understand the standard of life.

The irony to be noticed here is, as much as we do to increase our standard of living; so much is the trouble we create to our standard of life. I was happy when I had an old television without a remote control and now that tiny electronic hand held device goes below the couch or its batteries are exhausted or its keys are not working…..finally it brings in annoyance and makes me upset.

Oh...no, I am not advocating to stay with the old ones, the point I am want to make here is, we human beings should learn how to handle the external factors those were created only by us for our own external comfort. The very creation of these comfort facilities should not put us into a depressed and anxious state of mind.

Right at this moment our standard of our life does not depend on the house we’ve or the car we’ve parked outside or our bank balance. It’s solely based on “How Happy Are We…?” One could be a great millionaire but he may never be happy and one could be a homeless beggar but still he may feel delightful and absolutely happy in this world.

Let’s understand that, increasing out Standard of living makes our lives easier in this world, but it can never bring in happiness and joy forever. Increasing our Standard of Life is the only way we can be ultimately happy and blissful.

Swami Chinmayananda says:

“The material growth and prosperity raise the ‘standard of living,’ whereas the spiritual inner rehabilitation improves the ‘standard of life.’ Both the ‘standard of living’ and the ‘standard of life’ have to be equally developed and balanced in order that one may sail through life’s different challenges with ease, poise, comfort and cheer.

The ‘standard of living’ is like the mast of the ship. If it is to be high, the keel must be made deep and wide enough to prevent toppling and this depth of the keel measures the ‘standard of life.’

Thanks for visiting my page.

With Love
Anbusivam