Life Lessons from Children

Hello Friends,

Welcome to Anbusivam's Blog Page.

Today November 14th is Children's Day in India. I had a wonderful opportunity to take part in Children's Day Celebrations organised in our office. Colleagues had come to office with their children and family today for the gala celebrations.

As usual I took up my role as an "Observer", started observing the cute little children over there running around, playing, singing and dancing. Kids just live their life enjoying every moment, enthusiastic about everything, eager to learn, curious about everything and with full of contagious energy. Practical life lessons we could learn by just observing child's play is plenty.

Few learning's from those cute little ones are here:

1. Live every moment:

Children live their life spontaneously. Literally every moment is experienced just during that moment and is thoroughly enjoyed. Nothing is pre-planned, they take life as it comes without much of worry. Kids don't waste the right moment at hand in thinking about the future or past, they just live in that moment completely involved. We adults always repent for what happened in the past or anticipate what would happen in future, and in that very process we miss the present right in front of us.

2. Ask lots of questions:

Kids ask lots of questions on matters very trivial to adults. What...? Why...? How...? When...? Where...? would be their major vocabulary once they start understanding things around. There would always be greatest level of curiosity to learn, to understand and to know about every thing around them. Most of the time they may not get answers for all their questions, but it doesn't stop them from asking more questions.

3. No emotional baggage's carried:

Children never carry emotional baggage's like we adults do always in life. Kids don't carry on with their emotions in life. As child I used to quarrel with my sister, we fought a lot for simple things in life. But that will last for not more than few minutes. We will be playing, jumping and running just after that. But now as grown ups we experience each and every situation with some or other pre-conceived ideas in life.

4. Contagious positive energy:

I would always consider "Contagious positive energy" to be the best in children. They enjoy life with full of positive energy that's instantly contagious. Doesn't matter how big our problem is, simply watching a child's play would make us happy and enthusiastic. Their positive energy is highly contagious.

5. No Inhibitions:

Inhibitions are meaning less in Children's world. They just don't worry about anyone and anything around. Unlike adults they don't worry about the consequences, just never bother what others would think. Kids would always want to be themselves, irrespective of where they are. They carry around themselves as just they are.

6. Curious about everything:

Children are curious about everything around. Curiosity is what makes them touch the fire, catch a fly, eat a bug, run onto the streets, jump from the stairs and many more. Always be ing curious to explore new things gives them a never ending learning experiences.

7. Ego Less:

There is nothing called "ego" in Kid's world. Children never have "I" conscious, they just go with the life as it comes without any egoistic thoughts. They fight and quarrel for a moment and next moment we would find them playing as if nothing had happened. The best part of child's behaviour is complete surrender to the loved ones most often the mother.

8. Express the Feelings:
Children would freely express their feelings no matter they are. Their feelings are readily available on their faces for every one to see. Kids don't hide or conceal their feelings and emotions, instead they express them right at that moment. We don't have to guess what's a child's feeling as it will be very obvious in her face. Openly expressing feelings makes life easier and simpler of us and people around us.

I've just listed few practical learning's we could take from Children. Of course we all has gone through that life as a child, but somewhere in the process of growing up we've acquired few things that are not very useful to us and dropped down few things that may be of great help in life.

Let's go back to our wonderful childhood, wake up the little child in us, live life king size.

With Love,
Anbusivam

Yes, It's Ok to Start Again

Dear Friends,

Welcome to Anbusivam's Blog Page.

It's been more than two months now since I wrote a blog post.

After 2 long months, I am back to blogging. Yes, it’s been more than two months now…two long months. It is really long as I have missed almost more than 8 weeks of blogging. Initially I thought of taking break for a month after my wedding, but it got extended to more than two months. I was too busy in setting up our new home, also had friends visiting us with lots of love and kind wishes. It’s been overwhelming to receive good friends and kind relatives at our new home.

In spite of all my counseling classes and learning’s, I always used to wonder how I am going to cope up with a new relation called spouse in my life. I was worried how I am going to share my personal space with someone else whom I did not know for years. Fortunately, we had more than 3 months after we met till our marriage day. We shared a lot about our likes, dislikes, our childhood, school and college life, about our family, friends, relatives and many more. Now with my loving and caring wife Sangeetha beside me, life has taken a new facet. It’s nice to see lots of things are changing in life for good and better.

I feel great and rejuvenated to come back to you all through this blog again.

With this I am starting again.

I am sure I'll share more useful, interesting and informative thoughts here.

With Love,
Anbusivam

Being Right or Being Happy

Dear Friends,

Welcome to Anbusivam's Blog Page.

When I wrote about being right or happy in my previous post, many of my readers were keen to know more about it. Here comes my thoughts and understandings on one of the key learning’s from my counselling course.

"Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy...?"

Think for a moment when you were in an arugment and want to be right, don't you remember that you had to compromise on your happiness. I realised this when I was in an argument with one of my friends few weeks ago. I obviously wanted to make my point, knowing that he is not correct. But he was not in a mood to accept that he is wrong, which would be a blow to his big ego. After long arguments and counter arguments, I suddenly realised that the discussion had stuck into an endless circle, without any further progress. I started playing devil's advocate, carefully changing side to accept his point knowing very well that it's not right. I decided to do this only to stop those endless arguments just to prove a point. When we departed he was really happy that his point was accepted and finally he had won the argument. But I am sure that he himself had a doubt on the entire discussion and the point he was conveying and trying to convince me.

Later in the evening when he was little relaxed, I approached him with a clean reference supporting my argument stating that I was right in the morning. In no time he accepted the truth and apologised for being adamant during the morning discussion. I felt happy and he too was.

When I was thinking about the day that evening, it did strike to me that, though I was not right in the morning ultimately I was happy at end of the day. Many a times we tend to stick to our point in arguments and discussions with our loved ones, friends and colleagues without even thinking about the real purpose of the argument.

We should be courageous and courteous enough to give up something, though we know we are correct, while letting the other person win over us. This will be of utmost important especially with our family and loved ones, where the relationship and bonding is of highest priority than being right in a petty issue. Moreover these kinds of heated arguments and discussion always lead to fights shifting focus on the person instead of the real issue. When we are discussing an issue with another person, let's better put our focus on where it should be, on the real problem, not the other person.

When we choose being happiness over the need of being right, obviously a great relationship blossoms over there.

Whenever we are stuck in an argument with our loved ones, we should ask ourselves.

Do you want to be Happy or do you want to be Right...?

Thanks for visiting my page.

With Love,

Anbusivam